OT .....BAD NEWS: She has Cancer!!

Snipped from an earlier post........................I love her to
pieces. When I last saw her she called me over and said
" I wanna talk about something" OH GAWD! It was the "last wishes"
thing. I asked her what she wanted. She told me " Just do what ever
you want to do Honey" OMG!!!! I guess when I am 82 I will be ready
too?? I dunno. I can't bring myself to go in and do a pre arranged
thing and pick her casket. I do know I have to b/c when her day comes
I will much to much distraught to think clearly. She is totally my
responsibility. Maybe this is getting to me b/c her mental down hill
spiral is so sudden and we just did it with Larrys mom 2 years ago. I
know everyone has to go sometime including me but it is so hard to
think about ya know........................................
Thanks!
Laureen........................................... ....

It has been a harrowing weekend. Gram( who has been my "Mother" all my
life) took a turn for the worse. I went screaming down there and we
called 911 and she had to taken to the hospital. Her sudden downhill
spiral( confusion, pain, low oxygen sat levels) has been explained. I
am devasted. She has cancer. It was confirmed with xray and a CT scan
of her chest. The mass is in her lower right lobe of the lung. It has
invaded the lymph glands in her medial stinal sp area causing a high
calcium level, abnormal heart beat, and the hypoxia ( o2 saturation at
83%). She is in the advanced stage of lung cancer, terminal and I was
told by the pulmonologist today that this will take her life. He
doesnt know how long she has as she may have had this for a while and
it is manifesting itself now. They offered to do a brochoscopy to
stage it and see if it was large or small cell but she told the doc
"If you can't remove it then dont do anything" He then called me since
I have power of attorney and she has been incredibly confused and
asked me what to do. I told him, if she is terminal, then "No" keep
her comfortable. No more diagnostic, invasive treatments. She has been
in terible pain for quite a while now and has been unable to even sit
in bed. I conferred with all my cousins and they said I did the right
thing but I can't stop crying!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!! I have taken care of
her funeral arrangements so it wont be so much for me later... Your
thought and prayers are appreciated Thank you!
Laureen

I'm sorry, Laureen. So hard to do but you did the right thing.

In om,
Laureen stated
| Snipped from an earlier post........................I love her to
| pieces. When I last saw her she called me over and said
| " I wanna talk about something" OH GAWD! It was the "last wishes"
| thing. I asked her what she wanted. She told me " Just do what ever
| you want to do Honey" OMG!!!! I guess when I am 82 I will be ready
| too?? I dunno. I can't bring myself to go in and do a pre arranged
| thing and pick her casket. I do know I have to b/c when her day comes
| I will much to much distraught to think clearly. She is totally my
| responsibility. Maybe this is getting to me b/c her mental down hill
| spiral is so sudden and we just did it with Larrys mom 2 years ago. I
| know everyone has to go sometime including me but it is so hard to
| think about ya know........................................
| Thanks!
| Laureen........................................... ....
|
| It has been a harrowing weekend. Gram( who has been my "Mother" all my
| life) took a turn for the worse. I went screaming down there and we
| called 911 and she had to taken to the hospital. Her sudden downhill
| spiral( confusion, pain, low oxygen sat levels) has been explained. I
| am devasted. She has cancer. It was confirmed with xray and a CT scan
| of her chest. The mass is in her lower right lobe of the lung. It has
| invaded the lymph glands in her medial stinal sp area causing a high
| calcium level, abnormal heart beat, and the hypoxia ( o2 saturation at
| 83%). She is in the advanced stage of lung cancer, terminal and I was
| told by the pulmonologist today that this will take her life. He
| doesnt know how long she has as she may have had this for a while and
| it is manifesting itself now. They offered to do a brochoscopy to
| stage it and see if it was large or small cell but she told the doc
| "If you can't remove it then dont do anything" He then called me since
| I have power of attorney and she has been incredibly confused and
| asked me what to do. I told him, if she is terminal, then "No" keep
| her comfortable. No more diagnostic, invasive treatments. She has been
| in terible pain for quite a while now and has been unable to even sit
| in bed. I conferred with all my cousins and they said I did the right
| thing but I can't stop crying!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!! I have taken care of
| her funeral arrangements so it wont be so much for me later... Your
| thought and prayers are appreciated Thank you!
| Laureen

Laureen wrote:

I have power of attorney and she has been incredibly confused and
asked me what to do. I told him, if she is terminal, then "No" keep
her comfortable. No more diagnostic, invasive treatments. She has been
in terible pain for quite a while now and has been unable to even sit
in bed. I conferred with all my cousins and they said I did the right
thing but I can't stop crying!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!! I have taken care of
her funeral arrangements so it wont be so much for me later... Your
thought and prayers are appreciated Thank you!

You're doing the right thing. That's all you can do.

When my father was dying, I was torn between wanting his pain to stop
and not wanting to lose him. Even doing the right thing, it still hurts
like bloody hell.

I'm very sorry.

--
As you accelerate your food, it takes exponentially more and more energy
to increase its velocity, until you hit a limit at C. This energy has
to come from somewhere; in this case, from the food's nutritional value.
Thus, the faster the food is, the worse it gets.
-- Mark Hughes, comprehending the taste of fast food

Dear Laureen,

I'm sorry to hear about your Gram. I know how hard it is for you and how hard
it will be in the days to come.

My husband's father passed away this morning. He had many health problems over
the last few years, but congestive heart failure finally took him. He died at
home with his wife and two grown sons at his side.

My father in law's health had been deteriorating for the last 6 months, but
took a bad turn last week. We were on our way to my mother's in Atlanta,
stopped over at my inlaw's for a short visit and found that his condition had
changed just a few days before. My husband stayed for the next week to help
his mom care for his father. They worked very hard, got little sleep and
fretted over the many uncertainties. They did most of the nursing, but had
some hospice help.

Though it was a difficult and heartbreaking experience, I think my husband was
fortunate to have this opportunity to do this for his father.

If your Gram wishes to be at home, you can arrange for hospice care. You can
also arrange for her to stay at a hospice facility. It will be nicer than a
hospital. They ease pain, help with housekeeping and provide other support.
Shop around to see what hospice services are available in your city. I was
googling hospice for my husband last night. Maybe these links can help you:

http://www.vistacare.com/hospice/index.php
http://www.nhpco.org/templates/1/homepage.cfm
http://www.growthhouse.org/
http://www.careguide.com

a hospice directory
http://www.healthcarehiring.com/hospice_directory.html

Frequently Asked Questions (Hospice Web)
http://www.hospiceweb.com/faq.htm#assistance

I know you will find the strength when you need it, because you love your Gram.
You will do it. You will have hard decisions to make and you won't know if
they are right or wrong. Go easy on yourself, as you are learning "on the job"
and under duress. You will do the best you can and it will be the right thing.

Good luck to you.

Marcia

Laureen wrote:

It has been a harrowing weekend.

Laureen, this is such a difficult time for you. Hang in there. You did
the right thing. Now make every moment count and don't leave anything
unsaid.

Respectfully,

--
Deb
230/208.5/135

Laureen wrote:

I have power of attorney and she has been incredibly confused and
asked me what to do. I told him, if she is terminal, then "No" keep
her comfortable. No more diagnostic, invasive treatments. She has been
in terible pain for quite a while now and has been unable to even sit
in bed. I conferred with all my cousins and they said I did the right
thing but I can't stop crying!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!! I have taken care of
her funeral arrangements so it wont be so much for me later... Your
thought and prayers are appreciated Thank you!
Laureen

Laureen,

My prayers are with you and your family during this
difficult time. It always hurts to let a loved go. God
bless.

Marsha/Ohio

Laureen,

You are in my prayers.
--
Linda

"Laureen" wrote in message
om...
Snipped from an earlier post........................I love her to
pieces. When I last saw her she called me over and said
" I wanna talk about something" OH GAWD! It was the "last wishes"
thing. I asked her what she wanted. She told me " Just do what ever
you want to do Honey" OMG!!!! I guess when I am 82 I will be ready
too?? I dunno. I can't bring myself to go in and do a pre arranged
thing and pick her casket. I do know I have to b/c when her day comes
I will much to much distraught to think clearly. She is totally my
responsibility. Maybe this is getting to me b/c her mental down hill
spiral is so sudden and we just did it with Larrys mom 2 years ago. I
know everyone has to go sometime including me but it is so hard to
think about ya know........................................
Thanks!
Laureen........................................... ....

It has been a harrowing weekend. Gram( who has been my "Mother" all my
life) took a turn for the worse. I went screaming down there and we
called 911 and she had to taken to the hospital. Her sudden downhill
spiral( confusion, pain, low oxygen sat levels) has been explained. I
am devasted. She has cancer. It was confirmed with xray and a CT scan
of her chest. The mass is in her lower right lobe of the lung. It has
invaded the lymph glands in her medial stinal sp area causing a high
calcium level, abnormal heart beat, and the hypoxia ( o2 saturation at
83%). She is in the advanced stage of lung cancer, terminal and I was
told by the pulmonologist today that this will take her life. He
doesnt know how long she has as she may have had this for a while and
it is manifesting itself now. They offered to do a brochoscopy to
stage it and see if it was large or small cell but she told the doc
"If you can't remove it then dont do anything" He then called me since
I have power of attorney and she has been incredibly confused and
asked me what to do. I told him, if she is terminal, then "No" keep
her comfortable. No more diagnostic, invasive treatments. She has been
in terible pain for quite a while now and has been unable to even sit
in bed. I conferred with all my cousins and they said I did the right
thing but I can't stop crying!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!! I have taken care of
her funeral arrangements so it wont be so much for me later... Your
thought and prayers are appreciated Thank you!
Laureen

"Laureen" wrote in message
om...
Snipped from an earlier post........................I love her to
pieces. When I last saw her she called me over and said
" I wanna talk about something" OH GAWD! It was the "last wishes"
thing. I asked her what she wanted. She told me " Just do what ever
you want to do Honey" OMG!!!! I guess when I am 82 I will be ready
too?? I dunno. I can't bring myself to go in and do a pre arranged
thing and pick her casket. I do know I have to b/c when her day comes
I will much to much distraught to think clearly. She is totally my
responsibility. Maybe this is getting to me b/c her mental down hill
spiral is so sudden and we just did it with Larrys mom 2 years ago. I
know everyone has to go sometime including me but it is so hard to
think about ya know........................................
Thanks!
Laureen........................................... ....

It has been a harrowing weekend. Gram( who has been my "Mother" all my
life) took a turn for the worse. I went screaming down there and we
called 911 and she had to taken to the hospital. Her sudden downhill
spiral( confusion, pain, low oxygen sat levels) has been explained. I
am devasted. She has cancer. It was confirmed with xray and a CT scan
of her chest. The mass is in her lower right lobe of the lung. It has
invaded the lymph glands in her medial stinal sp area causing a high
calcium level, abnormal heart beat, and the hypoxia ( o2 saturation at
83%). She is in the advanced stage of lung cancer, terminal and I was
told by the pulmonologist today that this will take her life. He
doesnt know how long she has as she may have had this for a while and
it is manifesting itself now. They offered to do a brochoscopy to
stage it and see if it was large or small cell but she told the doc
"If you can't remove it then dont do anything" He then called me since
I have power of attorney and she has been incredibly confused and
asked me what to do. I told him, if she is terminal, then "No" keep
her comfortable. No more diagnostic, invasive treatments. She has been
in terible pain for quite a while now and has been unable to even sit
in bed. I conferred with all my cousins and they said I did the right
thing but I can't stop crying!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!! I have taken care of
her funeral arrangements so it wont be so much for me later... Your
thought and prayers are appreciated Thank you!
Laureen

Laureen, you are in my prayers. Even though everything that is born also
dies oneday, it is never easy to say goodbye to those we love. I lost my
mom in Feb. 2000 and I still miss her and even talk to her sometimes. I
believe she hears me.
--
Regards,
Evelyn

(to reply to me personally, remove 'sox")

On 31 May 2004 12:56:23 -0700, (Laureen) wrote:

It has been a harrowing weekend. Gram( who has been my "Mother" all my
life) took a turn for the worse. I went screaming down there and we
called 911 and she had to taken to the hospital. Her sudden downhill
spiral( confusion, pain, low oxygen sat levels) has been explained. I
am devasted. She has cancer. It was confirmed with xray and a CT scan
of her chest. The mass is in her lower right lobe of the lung. It has
invaded the lymph glands in her medial stinal sp area causing a high
calcium level, abnormal heart beat, and the hypoxia ( o2 saturation at
83%). She is in the advanced stage of lung cancer, terminal and I was
told by the pulmonologist today that this will take her life. He
doesnt know how long she has as she may have had this for a while and
it is manifesting itself now. They offered to do a brochoscopy to
stage it and see if it was large or small cell but she told the doc
"If you can't remove it then dont do anything" He then called me since
I have power of attorney and she has been incredibly confused and
asked me what to do. I told him, if she is terminal, then "No" keep
her comfortable. No more diagnostic, invasive treatments. She has been
in terible pain for quite a while now and has been unable to even sit
in bed. I conferred with all my cousins and they said I did the right
thing but I can't stop crying!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!! I have taken care of
her funeral arrangements so it wont be so much for me later... Your
thought and prayers are appreciated Thank you!

Laureen, I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry! May her journey be
peaceful, and may you have the strength to carry on.

Carol
--
Fasting BG 172
227/223/150 (official weigh-day: Thursday)
Bernstein 5/25/2004
Diabetes Dx 5/15/2001
Diet, Exercise, Oral Medication

On 31 May 2004 21:14:31 GMT, (Xray658) wrote:

My husband's father passed away this morning. He had many health problems over
the last few years, but congestive heart failure finally took him. He died at
home with his wife and two grown sons at his side.

My sincere sympathy to you, your husband, and his family.

Carol
--
Fasting BG 172
227/223/150 (official weigh-day: Thursday)
Bernstein 5/25/2004
Diabetes Dx 5/15/2001
Diet, Exercise, Oral Medication