Seeing Family and Friends a year later

I have displeased her big time. I don't even live that far away from her,
but have not desire to see her because of the negative attitude towards me.

Thank you for your support.

Debbie

"Miss Violette" wrote in message
...
sometimes people we care about are the first to push our buttons and if we
have displeased them they go out of their way to do it, you KNOW what the
scale says and you have the others, Lee,
Deb in Northern California wrote in message
...
I had some disappointing and them some good NSVs this past week. I have
not
seen any of these people since Christmas last year. So far I have lost
a
total of 65 pounds and my daughter has lost 41 pounds, between the two
of
us, we have lost my youngest daughter who weighs a whopping 106 pounds.
I
have lost 40 of my 65 in the past year. On to my disappointments and my
happy moments with friends and family.

Went to see mom for her 79th birthday last weekend. She tells my
daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.

For Thanksgiving, went to see my best friend and her family for dinner.
I
walked in the door and her and her husband were amazed at how much
different
I looked. They could not get over the weight loss. Even her mom, asked
if
I was losing weight or just working out at the gym, toning up. I told
her
it was both. They made me feel so good.

Then on to the ex-in-laws for dessert. They had not seen me in a few
months
and all of them made comments about my weight loss. So the 7 people
that
noticed surely offset my mother not noticing my weight loss.

At least I know that my co-workers, friends and non-blood family notice
me
even though my own mother can not see any differences in me.

Climbing down off my soapbox now.

Debbie

319.4/253.6/(Xmas goal 250)/150

I am not sure if everything will ever be okay with mom and me. There are
issues that go way back and I just rather avoid her than deal with her
negative thoughts and guilt trips.

Thank you for your support.

Debbie

"Lesanne" wrote in message
...
Debbie, I really must say that in my past, the 50 people who made positive
comments about my weight losses never made up for the things my own Mother
used to say to me. Before Mom got sick, around twenty years ago, I began
to
tell her how badly I felt when she made those comments to me. It was
really
hard to do, but after I did it, sometimes in groups of people even, if
that
was where she made the hurtful comment, she actually began to change. We
had
around 10 years of a better relationship before she began to get the
Alzheimers, and I am grateful for it now, because if we had not she would
be
in a nursing home, and I would be wracked with guilt.

--
Lesanne
"Deb in Northern California" wrote in message
...
I had some disappointing and them some good NSVs this past week. I have
not
seen any of these people since Christmas last year. So far I have lost
a
total of 65 pounds and my daughter has lost 41 pounds, between the two
of
us, we have lost my youngest daughter who weighs a whopping 106 pounds.
I
have lost 40 of my 65 in the past year. On to my disappointments and my
happy moments with friends and family.

Went to see mom for her 79th birthday last weekend. She tells my
daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.

For Thanksgiving, went to see my best friend and her family for dinner.
I
walked in the door and her and her husband were amazed at how much
different
I looked. They could not get over the weight loss. Even her mom, asked
if
I was losing weight or just working out at the gym, toning up. I told
her
it was both. They made me feel so good.

Then on to the ex-in-laws for dessert. They had not seen me in a few
months
and all of them made comments about my weight loss. So the 7 people
that
noticed surely offset my mother not noticing my weight loss.

At least I know that my co-workers, friends and non-blood family notice
me
even though my own mother can not see any differences in me.

Climbing down off my soapbox now.

Debbie

319.4/253.6/(Xmas goal 250)/150

I am not sure if everything will ever be okay with mom and me. There are
issues that go way back and I just rather avoid her than deal with her
negative thoughts and guilt trips.

Thank you for your support.

Debbie

"Lesanne" wrote in message
...
Debbie, I really must say that in my past, the 50 people who made positive
comments about my weight losses never made up for the things my own Mother
used to say to me. Before Mom got sick, around twenty years ago, I began
to
tell her how badly I felt when she made those comments to me. It was
really
hard to do, but after I did it, sometimes in groups of people even, if
that
was where she made the hurtful comment, she actually began to change. We
had
around 10 years of a better relationship before she began to get the
Alzheimers, and I am grateful for it now, because if we had not she would
be
in a nursing home, and I would be wracked with guilt.

--
Lesanne
"Deb in Northern California" wrote in message
...
I had some disappointing and them some good NSVs this past week. I have
not
seen any of these people since Christmas last year. So far I have lost
a
total of 65 pounds and my daughter has lost 41 pounds, between the two
of
us, we have lost my youngest daughter who weighs a whopping 106 pounds.
I
have lost 40 of my 65 in the past year. On to my disappointments and my
happy moments with friends and family.

Went to see mom for her 79th birthday last weekend. She tells my
daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.

For Thanksgiving, went to see my best friend and her family for dinner.
I
walked in the door and her and her husband were amazed at how much
different
I looked. They could not get over the weight loss. Even her mom, asked
if
I was losing weight or just working out at the gym, toning up. I told
her
it was both. They made me feel so good.

Then on to the ex-in-laws for dessert. They had not seen me in a few
months
and all of them made comments about my weight loss. So the 7 people
that
noticed surely offset my mother not noticing my weight loss.

At least I know that my co-workers, friends and non-blood family notice
me
even though my own mother can not see any differences in me.

Climbing down off my soapbox now.

Debbie

319.4/253.6/(Xmas goal 250)/150

Mom has always struggled with her weight as have I. I was over 200 lbs when
I was only 12 years old. Everyone in the family has struggled. I figure
one day I will get to a healthy weight, but like Lee (Miss Violet) I will
only do what I can live with for the rest of my life. I do not intend to do
the yo-yo route, as that is more detrimental to your health than maintaining
a high weight.

Thanks for your support.
Debbie

"Laura" wrote in message
...
I think mothers can be very cruel at times. I know my mother can be. I
have
been learning to ignore my mothers comments about my weight loss or I
might
not like the things that come out of my mouth. She has her own weight
issues
and can not deal with my sucess. Perhaps your mom is dealing with some
hidden feelings from her past that are being brought out by your weight
loss. Did she struggle with food or weight issues at some point in her
life.
It might be that she can't acknowledge your weight loss because it is too
painful for her to do so. Just remember that you are doing this for
yourself
and not for her. Her comments are not important as you getting to a
healthy
weight are.

"Deb in Northern California" wrote in message
...
I had some disappointing and them some good NSVs this past week. I have
not
seen any of these people since Christmas last year. So far I have lost
a
total of 65 pounds and my daughter has lost 41 pounds, between the two
of
us, we have lost my youngest daughter who weighs a whopping 106 pounds.
I
have lost 40 of my 65 in the past year. On to my disappointments and my
happy moments with friends and family.

Went to see mom for her 79th birthday last weekend. She tells my
daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.

For Thanksgiving, went to see my best friend and her family for dinner.
I
walked in the door and her and her husband were amazed at how much
different
I looked. They could not get over the weight loss. Even her mom, asked
if
I was losing weight or just working out at the gym, toning up. I told
her
it was both. They made me feel so good.

Then on to the ex-in-laws for dessert. They had not seen me in a few
months
and all of them made comments about my weight loss. So the 7 people
that
noticed surely offset my mother not noticing my weight loss.

At least I know that my co-workers, friends and non-blood family notice
me
even though my own mother can not see any differences in me.

Climbing down off my soapbox now.

Debbie

319.4/253.6/(Xmas goal 250)/150

Mom has always struggled with her weight as have I. I was over 200 lbs when
I was only 12 years old. Everyone in the family has struggled. I figure
one day I will get to a healthy weight, but like Lee (Miss Violet) I will
only do what I can live with for the rest of my life. I do not intend to do
the yo-yo route, as that is more detrimental to your health than maintaining
a high weight.

Thanks for your support.
Debbie

"Laura" wrote in message
...
I think mothers can be very cruel at times. I know my mother can be. I
have
been learning to ignore my mothers comments about my weight loss or I
might
not like the things that come out of my mouth. She has her own weight
issues
and can not deal with my sucess. Perhaps your mom is dealing with some
hidden feelings from her past that are being brought out by your weight
loss. Did she struggle with food or weight issues at some point in her
life.
It might be that she can't acknowledge your weight loss because it is too
painful for her to do so. Just remember that you are doing this for
yourself
and not for her. Her comments are not important as you getting to a
healthy
weight are.

"Deb in Northern California" wrote in message
...
I had some disappointing and them some good NSVs this past week. I have
not
seen any of these people since Christmas last year. So far I have lost
a
total of 65 pounds and my daughter has lost 41 pounds, between the two
of
us, we have lost my youngest daughter who weighs a whopping 106 pounds.
I
have lost 40 of my 65 in the past year. On to my disappointments and my
happy moments with friends and family.

Went to see mom for her 79th birthday last weekend. She tells my
daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.

For Thanksgiving, went to see my best friend and her family for dinner.
I
walked in the door and her and her husband were amazed at how much
different
I looked. They could not get over the weight loss. Even her mom, asked
if
I was losing weight or just working out at the gym, toning up. I told
her
it was both. They made me feel so good.

Then on to the ex-in-laws for dessert. They had not seen me in a few
months
and all of them made comments about my weight loss. So the 7 people
that
noticed surely offset my mother not noticing my weight loss.

At least I know that my co-workers, friends and non-blood family notice
me
even though my own mother can not see any differences in me.

Climbing down off my soapbox now.

Debbie

319.4/253.6/(Xmas goal 250)/150

Yes, she does, and as far as she is concerned I do everything wrong in her
eyes and I guess my weight loss is wrong to her too.

Thanks for your support.
Debbie

"Kate Dicey" wrote in message
...
Deb in Northern California wrote:

I had some disappointing and them some good NSVs this past week. I have
not
seen any of these people since Christmas last year. So far I have lost
a
total of 65 pounds and my daughter has lost 41 pounds, between the two
of
us, we have lost my youngest daughter who weighs a whopping 106 pounds.
I
have lost 40 of my 65 in the past year. On to my disappointments and my
happy moments with friends and family.

Went to see mom for her 79th birthday last weekend. She tells my
daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.

For Thanksgiving, went to see my best friend and her family for dinner.
I
walked in the door and her and her husband were amazed at how much
different
I looked. They could not get over the weight loss. Even her mom, asked
if
I was losing weight or just working out at the gym, toning up. I told
her
it was both. They made me feel so good.

Then on to the ex-in-laws for dessert. They had not seen me in a few
months
and all of them made comments about my weight loss. So the 7 people
that
noticed surely offset my mother not noticing my weight loss.

At least I know that my co-workers, friends and non-blood family notice
me
even though my own mother can not see any differences in me.

Climbing down off my soapbox now.

Debbie

319.4/253.6/(Xmas goal 250)/150



I think your mother has special filters in her specs... Well done,
and a nice collection of NSVs!

--
Kate XXXXXX
Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons
http://www.diceyhome.free-online.co.uk
Click on Kate's Pages and explore!

Yes, she does, and as far as she is concerned I do everything wrong in her
eyes and I guess my weight loss is wrong to her too.

Thanks for your support.
Debbie

"Kate Dicey" wrote in message
...
Deb in Northern California wrote:

I had some disappointing and them some good NSVs this past week. I have
not
seen any of these people since Christmas last year. So far I have lost
a
total of 65 pounds and my daughter has lost 41 pounds, between the two
of
us, we have lost my youngest daughter who weighs a whopping 106 pounds.
I
have lost 40 of my 65 in the past year. On to my disappointments and my
happy moments with friends and family.

Went to see mom for her 79th birthday last weekend. She tells my
daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.

For Thanksgiving, went to see my best friend and her family for dinner.
I
walked in the door and her and her husband were amazed at how much
different
I looked. They could not get over the weight loss. Even her mom, asked
if
I was losing weight or just working out at the gym, toning up. I told
her
it was both. They made me feel so good.

Then on to the ex-in-laws for dessert. They had not seen me in a few
months
and all of them made comments about my weight loss. So the 7 people
that
noticed surely offset my mother not noticing my weight loss.

At least I know that my co-workers, friends and non-blood family notice
me
even though my own mother can not see any differences in me.

Climbing down off my soapbox now.

Debbie

319.4/253.6/(Xmas goal 250)/150



I think your mother has special filters in her specs... Well done,
and a nice collection of NSVs!

--
Kate XXXXXX
Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons
http://www.diceyhome.free-online.co.uk
Click on Kate's Pages and explore!

What did you do with the corn? Leenck wrote in
message ...
On 11/27/04 4:04 AM, in article , "Deb in
Northern California" wrote:

She tells my daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.
Mothers and their relations with daughters get very weird sometimes.
Mine,
who was certifiably nutty as I have remarked elsewhere, did the following
once: I had finally learned to love veggies without loading them up with
butter (still prefer them that way now) and she started making an issue at
a
family/friends dinner about my not buttering my corn. I told her I didn't
like it that way and she kept pestering me about it. When I left the room
for a minute to get something from the kitchen I came back and found she
had
buttered the corn...dripping! She seemed to regard my good habits as my
"showing off" and trying to "act like I was better than everybody else."
So you have a lot more company here, I'm sure.

She may be ignoring your sucess because she is jealous. And until she comes
to terms with her weight issues she'll never acknowledge your sucess. I
agree that it will only aggrevate you to see her when she has a negative
attitude towards you. Hopefully one day things will work out between the two
of you.

"Deb in Northern California" wrote in message
...
Mom has always struggled with her weight as have I. I was over 200 lbs
when
I was only 12 years old. Everyone in the family has struggled. I figure
one day I will get to a healthy weight, but like Lee (Miss Violet) I will
only do what I can live with for the rest of my life. I do not intend to
do
the yo-yo route, as that is more detrimental to your health than
maintaining
a high weight.

Thanks for your support.
Debbie

"Laura" wrote in message
...
I think mothers can be very cruel at times. I know my mother can be. I
have
been learning to ignore my mothers comments about my weight loss or I
might
not like the things that come out of my mouth. She has her own weight
issues
and can not deal with my sucess. Perhaps your mom is dealing with some
hidden feelings from her past that are being brought out by your weight
loss. Did she struggle with food or weight issues at some point in her
life.
It might be that she can't acknowledge your weight loss because it is
too
painful for her to do so. Just remember that you are doing this for
yourself
and not for her. Her comments are not important as you getting to a
healthy
weight are.

"Deb in Northern California" wrote in
message
...
I had some disappointing and them some good NSVs this past week. I
have
not
seen any of these people since Christmas last year. So far I have
lost
a
total of 65 pounds and my daughter has lost 41 pounds, between the two
of
us, we have lost my youngest daughter who weighs a whopping 106
pounds.
I
have lost 40 of my 65 in the past year. On to my disappointments and
my
happy moments with friends and family.

Went to see mom for her 79th birthday last weekend. She tells my
daughter
that she is impressed with her weight loss as it really shows on her
then
proceeds to tell me that she does not see any difference in me. I was
truly
disappointed with that, but figure mom is not happy with me at the
moment
any way and it is her way of hurting my feelings.

For Thanksgiving, went to see my best friend and her family for
dinner.
I
walked in the door and her and her husband were amazed at how much
different
I looked. They could not get over the weight loss. Even her mom,
asked
if
I was losing weight or just working out at the gym, toning up. I told
her
it was both. They made me feel so good.

Then on to the ex-in-laws for dessert. They had not seen me in a few
months
and all of them made comments about my weight loss. So the 7 people
that
noticed surely offset my mother not noticing my weight loss.

At least I know that my co-workers, friends and non-blood family
notice
me
even though my own mother can not see any differences in me.

Climbing down off my soapbox now.

Debbie

319.4/253.6/(Xmas goal 250)/150

me to is why I asked, Lee
Lesanne wrote in message
...
Uh oh. With my sense of humor, you Know what I want her to have done with
the greasy ole corn......

--
Lesanne
"Miss Violette" wrote in message
...
What did you do with the corn?