a note to ignoranus

"alien" wrote in message
88.18...

I have to totally agree with you there. I for one like bluntness. I would
rather be told something for what something is. Not sugar coat it and
make the spider out to be a butterfly. If you get what I mean.

And what are you sugar coating? Blunt isn't the problem, his ignorance is.

The reason some (not all, so please don't flame,I'm not pointing fingers)
people get oversensitive is because the truth can hurt sometimes and we
have to step back and say. Woah! That is me.We just have to learn to take
it and learn from it. Not shoot off our guns to make up for the hurt.
(again just speaking in general,not toward anyone.)If the point given
does not relate to a persons situation they should just simply move on
and not give it another thought.

And when I'm specifically mentioned by name over and over I guess I should
assume it's another JMA or Jennifer. I'm wondering when I'll see some truth
that might hurt. Why is it that I go and lose half my body weight on a
special diet after 30 years of morbid obesity, maintain weight loss for
months now having to learn a whole new WOE that I didn't actually get to
practice until maintenance all while dealing with a serious eating disorder,
and an adrenal disorder and turning myself into a physcially fit, relatively
healthy individual and yet I'm somehow in denial about my "real" situation?
I tried walking on water - I don't even float anymore. I guess I'm still a
complete failure though I am the *only* person from my HMR group who still
attends maintenance. Yep, call me Cleo the queen of denial.

Jenn

"rosie" wrote in message
...

I realize I can't get you to stop talking about me as if you know
a thing
about my personal situation. Just so you know, I'm not going to
respond to
you. Other people may find your tactless ignorance charming or
even
tolerable, but I don't. It would make me happier than anything if
you could
just disregard my existence as I try to do with you.



congrats to you JMA for taking control of your life and your
recovery!
rosie


Thanks rosie - it's one day at a time.
Jenn

Ignoramus18484 wrote:

In article , Dally wrote:

Having your "overeating" under control is a good indicator that you are
a compulsive eater, in fact.


which is what I am saying, no? Or have you missed "not" someplace?
I am confused.

Sorry, I was missing the "not" I don't believe you are a compulsive
over-eater based on your stories. You were a generic over-eater who
controls his over-eating deliberately now. The term I like is
"restrained" eater. You restrain yourself via your gimmicks. A
"restrained" eater can become an "unrestrained" eater on vacations or on
holidays or whatever, but they go back to being aware of choosing to eat
appropriately after the occasion is over. That sounds more like you.

Dally

From: "JMA"
Subject: a note to ignoranus
Date: Wednesday, February 25, 2004 2:29 PM


I didn't really intend for this to become a bashing session. I just wanted
to point out again that assumptions are being made about ME with very little
actual facts and I don't appreciate it.

He makes ASSumptions about everyone. Nothing new here.

It doesn't matter how many posts you or anyone else (including me)
can write telling him off. He will never stop being who he is.... Some
people are smart enough to evolve into a better human being and some
aren't.

Yup, good point. Also, he's so busy thinking that he's better than
everyone else that he cannot see that there is A LOT of room for
improvement.

That's his problem. I just want him to stop talking about me like he knows
anything about me.

Jenn

No one appreciates that kind of thing. I certainly don't. I hope he stops
and starts minding his own business.

Martha

"JMA" wrote in
:


"alien" wrote in message
88.18...

I have to totally agree with you there. I for one like bluntness. I
would rather be told something for what something is. Not sugar coat
it and make the spider out to be a butterfly. If you get what I mean.

And what are you sugar coating? Blunt isn't the problem, his
ignorance is.

The reason some (not all, so please don't flame,I'm not pointing
fingers) people get oversensitive is because the truth can hurt
sometimes and we have to step back and say. Woah! That is me.We just
have to learn to take it and learn from it. Not shoot off our guns to
make up for the hurt. (again just speaking in general,not toward
anyone.)If the point given does not relate to a persons situation
they should just simply move on and not give it another thought.

And when I'm specifically mentioned by name over and over I guess I
should assume it's another JMA or Jennifer. I'm wondering when I'll
see some truth that might hurt. Why is it that I go and lose half my
body weight on a special diet after 30 years of morbid obesity,
maintain weight loss for months now having to learn a whole new WOE
that I didn't actually get to practice until maintenance all while
dealing with a serious eating disorder, and an adrenal disorder and
turning myself into a physcially fit, relatively healthy individual
and yet I'm somehow in denial about my "real" situation? I tried
walking on water - I don't even float anymore. I guess I'm still a
complete failure though I am the *only* person from my HMR group who
still attends maintenance. Yep, call me Cleo the queen of denial.

Jenn



I was speaking in general.I am so Sorry if you were offended by my
comment.I am not the type of person who would hurt anyone
intentionaly.When I say I'm sorry you can believe I mean it. It's not
just for group points. And Jenn I DO know where people are comming from
with thier struggle with disorders. I am obsessive compulsive and have
been in and out of therapy for years dealing with binging.I remember the
nights I would buy a bunch of junk food the day before and hide it in the
trunk of my car only to go out in the middle of the night and set in my
car and eat it all. I would actually plan my binges daily.And think about
them all day until they happen. Then cry and cry while I was planning my
next personal binge party.I would lie about how much I got paid week to
week so I could put asside money especially for my daily binges.I knew I
was killing myself with food but I honestly could not control myself!
Over the past few years I have learned to focus that drawing need of my
disorder toward other things. The 2 things that have saved my life a
1.learning to live healthy as hard as it is and enjoy it. And it is hard.
VERY. and #2.GARDENING.. I actually even invested in a green house to
keep me occupied in the winter time. People that have no disorder can't
relate to that jittery feeling you feel in the back of your body that
eventually wins over and causes anguish. Just think I have a panic
disorder on top of all that!! Lucky me.
I am totally here anytime you need to talk or just vent. Again I would
never say anything to hurt you intentionally. So please dont take my
words in a hurtfull or finger pointing manner.

--
---------------
starting 365
current 216
goal 200
hieght 6'3"
27 male

NC In Da House
---------------

"alien" wrote in message
88.18...
I am totally here anytime you need to talk or just vent. Again I would
never say anything to hurt you intentionally. So please dont take my
words in a hurtfull or finger pointing manner.

--

Not to turn this into a giant group hug or anything, but thanks I had
only intended to point out that while at times we all need a good swift kick
to get us in the right direction, I didn't appreciate the frequent comments
made from ignorance and arrogance by a specific other about me. His remarks
about me and to me do not come from a good place, are not appreciated, and
he needs to focus his energies somewhere else.

You and I have a lot in common besides membership in the 150 lb club, except
that I have a "black" thumb instead of a green one You might be
interested in knowing that my doctor really believes that my anxiety
problems have an organic basis and are probably related to the
adrenal/hormone issues that we're attempting to resolve.

Keep up the good work!
Jenn

You might as well tell him to stop thinking about Pink Elephants....

That's his problem. I just want him to stop talking about me like he
knows
anything about me.

Jenn

No one appreciates that kind of thing. I certainly don't. I hope he stops
and starts minding his own business.

Martha

Hey Alien,

I feel for you and identify with you.. been there done that. I used to plan
my binges for Friday night while my ex hubby went out with his friends.
Friday night was our night apart to hang out with friends. He would usually
go to strip clubs and I would sit at home, eat a cheesecake and a gallon of
ice cream and still want more. My only friend (and enemy) then was the crap
I shoved down my throat. The first binge I remember, I was 6 or 7 years
old. My father was a very emotionally abusive man that I could never do
right by. My childhood started my obsessive/compulsive disorder over food,
etc. I started smoking at 17. I met my ex hubby when I was 18, my first
year in college. He was also emotionally needy, distant and hurtful during
the 12 years we were together. I just didn't know any better since that was
the way I was always treated and was used to it.... I had zero self esteem
and didn't think it mattered. I hid from the world. The scariest part now
is losing the weight and looking better and getting more attention.

What created your obsession toward food???

Screw it, I am sick of dealing with all of this emotional baggage and trying
to work my way out of the hole that WAS my life. Alien, I know how hard it
is for you to change your life. Whereas you garden, I take it to the gym
now.... I put all that stress, compulsion and obsession at the gym. I am
trading one compulsion for another. It may not be the healthiest move, but
it is what I am doing.

"alien" wrote in message I am
obsessive compulsive and have
been in and out of therapy for years dealing with binging.I remember the
nights I would buy a bunch of junk food the day before and hide it in the
trunk of my car only to go out in the middle of the night and set in my
car and eat it all. I would actually plan my binges daily.And think about
them all day until they happen. Then cry and cry while I was planning my
next personal binge party.I would lie about how much I got paid week to
week so I could put asside money especially for my daily binges.I knew I
was killing myself with food but I honestly could not control myself!
Over the past few years I have learned to focus that drawing need of my
disorder toward other things. The 2 things that have saved my life a
1.learning to live healthy as hard as it is and enjoy it. And it is hard.
VERY. and #2.GARDENING.. I actually even invested in a green house to
keep me occupied in the winter time. People that have no disorder can't
relate to that jittery feeling you feel in the back of your body that
eventually wins over and causes anguish. Just think I have a panic
disorder on top of all that!! Lucky me.
I am totally here anytime you need to talk or just vent. Again I would
never say anything to hurt you intentionally. So please dont take my
words in a hurtfull or finger pointing manner.

--
---------------
starting 365
current 216
goal 200
hieght 6'3"
27 male

NC In Da House
---------------

Hey Dally,

I guess you told us. I guess we won't stand up to him. We'll just let Ig
not treat us with respect or discretion in this newsgroup. It is just Ig
being Ig... harmless little ignorant man.

"Dally" wrote in message Getting on his case for
annoying you really says more
about you than it does him.

Dally

Alien, your post about hiding food for planned binge is LIKE ME!! It's a
'good feeling' to KNOW the others who are like me) who can really
say:I KNOW how you feel" and mean it I found this here and my
heart isn't as heavy anymore Thanks for sharing what is deep inside !

glo