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"Hidden Benefits of Body Size" (whoops, kind of long)



 
 
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  #21  
Old December 10th, 2004, 05:42 PM
Mary M/Ohio
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"Gal Called J.J." wrote in message
...

I recognize a couple of those in myself -- thanks, Mary, quite
an eye-opener...


It's really been a good read for me ... and I've been developing my own list
which I will post, and would love to hear any input as to your own
reactions. Thanks, J.J.!

Mary


  #22  
Old December 10th, 2004, 05:42 PM
Mary M/Ohio
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"Gal Called J.J." wrote in message
...

I recognize a couple of those in myself -- thanks, Mary, quite
an eye-opener...


It's really been a good read for me ... and I've been developing my own list
which I will post, and would love to hear any input as to your own
reactions. Thanks, J.J.!

Mary


  #23  
Old December 10th, 2004, 05:43 PM
Mary M/Ohio
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"Carol Frilegh" wrote in message
...
In article , Gal Called J.J.
wrote:

One time on Usenet, "Mary M/Ohio"
said:

snip

"What does your weight loss say for you?

"Notice I don't look different from most others.
It's not about me

I am in charge of myself.
I feel competent
I am a good mother. NOT!
Don't feel sorry for me.
I still don't want sex.
I am stable and dependable.
Don't mess with me.
I expect to live up to my commitments
I don't need to be perfect.
Respect my boundaries
I feel angry when it's appropriate.
I strive to be all I can be.
I am worthy.
I have not given up.
I am loyal to myself first
I like being grown up.
I was not put in this world to live up to your expectations.
I will level with you when things bother me about our relationship
Sometimes I need space and solitude.
I enjoy love, acceptance and praise, but am not addicted to them"


You are funny, Carol -- and a lot of these were very thought-provoking for
me. I like the concept of "what does your weight LOSS say about you" -- I
wouldn't have thought of that!

Mary


  #24  
Old December 10th, 2004, 05:43 PM
Mary M/Ohio
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Posts: n/a
Default


"Carol Frilegh" wrote in message
...
In article , Gal Called J.J.
wrote:

One time on Usenet, "Mary M/Ohio"
said:

snip

"What does your weight loss say for you?

"Notice I don't look different from most others.
It's not about me

I am in charge of myself.
I feel competent
I am a good mother. NOT!
Don't feel sorry for me.
I still don't want sex.
I am stable and dependable.
Don't mess with me.
I expect to live up to my commitments
I don't need to be perfect.
Respect my boundaries
I feel angry when it's appropriate.
I strive to be all I can be.
I am worthy.
I have not given up.
I am loyal to myself first
I like being grown up.
I was not put in this world to live up to your expectations.
I will level with you when things bother me about our relationship
Sometimes I need space and solitude.
I enjoy love, acceptance and praise, but am not addicted to them"


You are funny, Carol -- and a lot of these were very thought-provoking for
me. I like the concept of "what does your weight LOSS say about you" -- I
wouldn't have thought of that!

Mary


  #25  
Old December 11th, 2004, 04:04 PM
Dally
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Default

Mary M/Ohio wrote:
"Dally" wrote in message
...


By the way, I just finised reading "Passing for Thin" by Frances Kuffel
and it was an astonishingly good book.



I need to read that one too-- thanks for the reminder!


It's roughly broken down into three sections: "The Planet of Fat", "Leaving
the Planet of Fat" and "Arriving at the Planet of Girl." I never got as
obese as she did, and I don't have her food addiction issues in the same
sense, but nearly everything she wrote was familiar. It was an excellent
read.



I am going to look for it-- it sounds like "me."


Frankly, I thought you might have written it. My guess is it's going to
scare you how much she got inside your head.


Thanks for sharing your
thoughts -- you often cause me to stop and think about the deeper issues of
getting/being/staying/reversing overweight.


Thanks for the nice compliment.

Dally
244/170-ish/165
  #26  
Old December 11th, 2004, 04:04 PM
Dally
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Default

Mary M/Ohio wrote:
"Dally" wrote in message
...


By the way, I just finised reading "Passing for Thin" by Frances Kuffel
and it was an astonishingly good book.



I need to read that one too-- thanks for the reminder!


It's roughly broken down into three sections: "The Planet of Fat", "Leaving
the Planet of Fat" and "Arriving at the Planet of Girl." I never got as
obese as she did, and I don't have her food addiction issues in the same
sense, but nearly everything she wrote was familiar. It was an excellent
read.



I am going to look for it-- it sounds like "me."


Frankly, I thought you might have written it. My guess is it's going to
scare you how much she got inside your head.


Thanks for sharing your
thoughts -- you often cause me to stop and think about the deeper issues of
getting/being/staying/reversing overweight.


Thanks for the nice compliment.

Dally
244/170-ish/165
  #27  
Old December 12th, 2004, 12:37 PM
MH
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Posts: n/a
Default


"Mary M/Ohio" wrote in message
...

"Dally" wrote in message
...
I found the same concept in the book "Fattitudes" by Willard.


I need to get that one from the library.

It was a really useful exercise for me to go through and list the

benefits
of being fat. I did it online, actually, and it was horribly revealing.
Even worse because one of the guys on MFW saw it here and thought it was
hilarious and cross-posted it over to MFW so they could laugh at me.


All I can say to that is, consider the source. I have no use for that
newsgroup -- to me, a bunch of misanthropic, self-appointed experts who

make
a perfect case study of why *not* to take the ECA stack. I can get better
information from any other source. "Don't walk away from negative

people --
run."


Exactly. It's like saying, 'wow, it really hurt when they beat to a pulp,
but I deserved it.' No one deserves the abuse others give them, simple as
that.

Martha


  #28  
Old December 12th, 2004, 12:37 PM
MH
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"Mary M/Ohio" wrote in message
...

"Dally" wrote in message
...
I found the same concept in the book "Fattitudes" by Willard.


I need to get that one from the library.

It was a really useful exercise for me to go through and list the

benefits
of being fat. I did it online, actually, and it was horribly revealing.
Even worse because one of the guys on MFW saw it here and thought it was
hilarious and cross-posted it over to MFW so they could laugh at me.


All I can say to that is, consider the source. I have no use for that
newsgroup -- to me, a bunch of misanthropic, self-appointed experts who

make
a perfect case study of why *not* to take the ECA stack. I can get better
information from any other source. "Don't walk away from negative

people --
run."


Exactly. It's like saying, 'wow, it really hurt when they beat to a pulp,
but I deserved it.' No one deserves the abuse others give them, simple as
that.

Martha


  #29  
Old December 13th, 2004, 02:39 AM
JMA
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Posts: n/a
Default


"Mary M/Ohio" wrote in message
...

"Chris" wrote in message
oups.com...
I've also recently read Passing for Thin. I agree that it's very good,
and very thought-provoking. I also don't have the same sort of
addiction issues, but the issues of changing self-image are very real
to me and are very well handled in the book.

After reading what Mary wrote, I'm going to go over to amazon and order
"The Solution". I really fascinated by the self-image aspect of all
this right now.


Me too! I am having a hard time, even gravitating toward larger clothes
that I think would fit me well, or too-small clothes that look like they
would fit when they're on the hanger, but then it turns out I can't even
squeeze them over my torso. Having a very hard time with what I actually
look like and what fits me. Clothing manufacturers don't help with their
arbitrary sizes, either! Sometimes I swim in a Large -- sometimes I can't
even get a Large onto my pinky!


I still have the same problem, though there is quite a disparity between
manufacturers so a large in one brand won't always be the same as a large in
another brand. I had a friend explain to me that due to the manufacturing
process, most jeans of even the same brand can have quite the variation
within the same size.


I still have a lot of difficult thinking of myself as a fairly small
person, which I really am right now. When I'm shopping for clothing, I
find it very strange to go to the smallest end of the rack. Oddly,
though, size 6 clothes don't look small to me -- they just sort of look
like "my size" -- no different than a size 22 used to look to me when I
looked at it.


I am having these same feelings of disparity.


Me too.

Of course, now if I look at a 22 it seems really big,


Sometimes a 22 looks like it will fit me fine. :-)

but somehow inside my head I don't really feel much different. I
suppose this is changing a bit over time and will continue to; we shall
see :-).


It is certainly an interesting experience, isn't it -- I feel like I'm
dealing with issues that normal people deal with when they're about 14.
:-) Thanks for your thoughts, Chris -- I am always interested in what you
have to say, and you are a great example for me.

That's a really interesting way of putting it. It describes a lot of what I
went through and am still doing to a lesser extent. I had to get a few
friends to help me figure out some clothing issues.

Jenn


  #30  
Old December 13th, 2004, 02:39 AM
JMA
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"Mary M/Ohio" wrote in message
...

"Chris" wrote in message
oups.com...
I've also recently read Passing for Thin. I agree that it's very good,
and very thought-provoking. I also don't have the same sort of
addiction issues, but the issues of changing self-image are very real
to me and are very well handled in the book.

After reading what Mary wrote, I'm going to go over to amazon and order
"The Solution". I really fascinated by the self-image aspect of all
this right now.


Me too! I am having a hard time, even gravitating toward larger clothes
that I think would fit me well, or too-small clothes that look like they
would fit when they're on the hanger, but then it turns out I can't even
squeeze them over my torso. Having a very hard time with what I actually
look like and what fits me. Clothing manufacturers don't help with their
arbitrary sizes, either! Sometimes I swim in a Large -- sometimes I can't
even get a Large onto my pinky!


I still have the same problem, though there is quite a disparity between
manufacturers so a large in one brand won't always be the same as a large in
another brand. I had a friend explain to me that due to the manufacturing
process, most jeans of even the same brand can have quite the variation
within the same size.


I still have a lot of difficult thinking of myself as a fairly small
person, which I really am right now. When I'm shopping for clothing, I
find it very strange to go to the smallest end of the rack. Oddly,
though, size 6 clothes don't look small to me -- they just sort of look
like "my size" -- no different than a size 22 used to look to me when I
looked at it.


I am having these same feelings of disparity.


Me too.

Of course, now if I look at a 22 it seems really big,


Sometimes a 22 looks like it will fit me fine. :-)

but somehow inside my head I don't really feel much different. I
suppose this is changing a bit over time and will continue to; we shall
see :-).


It is certainly an interesting experience, isn't it -- I feel like I'm
dealing with issues that normal people deal with when they're about 14.
:-) Thanks for your thoughts, Chris -- I am always interested in what you
have to say, and you are a great example for me.

That's a really interesting way of putting it. It describes a lot of what I
went through and am still doing to a lesser extent. I had to get a few
friends to help me figure out some clothing issues.

Jenn


 




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