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#141
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
"teachrmama" wrote:
So do you think he deliberately plans to regain it? Or do you think he fails to plan (a maintenance program) therefore he "plans to fail" because of the lack of a maintenance program? That's it. The first year it was fails to plan. The second year it was fails to plan. By the fourth year it was plans to fail. Each year there has to be some expectation of learning. At some point it evolves from fails to plan to plans to fail to intends to regain. And nobody else here has ever done something similar (gaining and losing a number of times before they got it right)? Caleb is very up front with his successes and failures, so it's easy to criticize him. How many of us would like our successes and failures paraded out in similar fashion? I know I wouldn't!! (Or maybe I'm the only one here who ever lost, regained, lost, regained, before I finally got it right) I lose and regain as well. What I finally learned is that if I declare an end date that means I have declared a day when I plan on starting to regain. Lots of people on ASD have tried various ways to get that through to Caleb so I picked a way of saying that same thing that I couldn't find anyone else had used. Having phases last some number of days is fine. Having the diet last some number of days isn't. Though I lose and regain, I stay on some phase of my plan. It is a mental difference - Staying on plan is the right thing to do so when I am regaining I'm doing the wrong thing not returning to normal. |
#142
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
On Feb 6, 9:16 am, "Doug Freyburger" wrote:
"teachrmama" wrote: So do you think he deliberately plans to regain it? Or do you think he fails to plan (a maintenance program) therefore he "plans to fail" because of the lack of a maintenance program? That's it. The first year it was fails to plan. The second year it was fails to plan. By the fourth year it was plans to fail. Each year there has to be some expectation of learning. At some point it evolves from fails to plan to plans to fail to intends to regain. And nobody else here has ever done something similar (gaining and losing a number of times before they got it right)? Caleb is very up front with his successes and failures, so it's easy to criticize him. How many of us would like our successes and failures paraded out in similar fashion? I know I wouldn't!! (Or maybe I'm the only one here who ever lost, regained, lost, regained, before I finally got it right) I lose and regain as well. What I finally learned is that if I declare an end date that means I have declared a day when I plan on starting to regain. Lots of people on ASD have tried various ways to get that through to Caleb so I picked a way of saying that same thing that I couldn't find anyone else had used. Having phases last some number of days is fine. Having the diet last some number of days isn't. Though I lose and regain, I stay on some phase of my plan. It is a mental difference - Staying on plan is the right thing to do so when I am regaining I'm doing the wrong thing not returning to normal. Doug -- You said I intentionally gained weight -- at least I'm pretty sure that's what you said. Seems to me that you may have indeed said something that no one else said (with the possible exception of one or two people) but that also you were saying something untrue, which you said you did to make a point. (At least I interpret the following to indicate that you were chosing the following to "get that through" to me: "so I picked a way of saying that same thing that I couldn't find anyone else had used." Hopefully I don't say things that are untrue simply to make a point. I don't believe I have, other than to our children at times when they were far younger than now. strightforwardness turns out to be by far the best policy. Saves explaining later, among other things. As for the deadline way of doing things -- that's great that your system works for you! Different strokes for different folks! Have a nice day! Yours, Caleb |
#143
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
"Caleb" wrote:
Doug -- You said I intentionally gained weight -- at least I'm pretty sure that's what you said. Seems to me that you may have indeed said something that no one else said (with the possible exception of one or two people) I also wrote that actions speak louder than words. Consider that you've planned your 100 days year after year. but that also you were saying something untrue, When actions disagree with words, the fact that actions speak louder than words matters. What you think and say doesn't matter as much as what you have done each year. What does it mean to be "intentional"? Clearly several ASD regulars disagree with you on your own intent, and they do so based on your history. which you said you did to make a point. I used different phrasing to say the same thing others have said. If you see what I have written as different from what others have written then I suggest that you didn't understand those other people and/or didn't understand me. (At least I interpret the following to indicate that you were chosing the following to "get that through" to me: "so I picked a way of saying that same thing that I couldn't find anyone else had used." The same meaning can be encoded in various wordings. The fact that my words were different does not say the underlying meaning is different. The fact that I elicited a different response means you managed to decode my encoding better or differently, not that the message I sent was different. As for the deadline way of doing things -- that's great that your system works for you! Different strokes for different folks! Indeed. May you have a maintenance plan this time around. |
#144
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
Snip:
Caleb said: As for the deadline way of doing things -- that's great that your system works for you! Different strokes for different folks! And you said: Indeed. May you have a maintenance plan this time around. Well, I had a maintenance plan last time too, but it wasn't very effective. This time I believe it will be. Yours, Caleb |
#145
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
"The Queen of Cans and Jars" wrote in message .. . teachrmama wrote: "The Queen of Cans and Jars" wrote: teachrmama wrote: "The Queen of Cans and Jars" wrote: teachrmama wrote: Fine--prove to me that he deliberately regains the weight. Show me where he has posted that he loses weight just in order to gain it again. You are incredibly ignorant. In what way? In the way that you refuse to understand what multiple people are telling you. What, specifically, are you telling me? That I'm done. You are clearly content to be ignorant; in fact, you seem to enjoy arguing for remaining ignorant. I have no desire to engage you in that argument. Have a nice day. You have a nice day, too. |
#146
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
"Doug Freyburger" wrote in message oups.com... "teachrmama" wrote: So do you think he deliberately plans to regain it? Or do you think he fails to plan (a maintenance program) therefore he "plans to fail" because of the lack of a maintenance program? That's it. The first year it was fails to plan. The second year it was fails to plan. By the fourth year it was plans to fail. Each year there has to be some expectation of learning. At some point it evolves from fails to plan to plans to fail to intends to regain. And nobody else here has ever done something similar (gaining and losing a number of times before they got it right)? Caleb is very up front with his successes and failures, so it's easy to criticize him. How many of us would like our successes and failures paraded out in similar fashion? I know I wouldn't!! (Or maybe I'm the only one here who ever lost, regained, lost, regained, before I finally got it right) I lose and regain as well. What I finally learned is that if I declare an end date that means I have declared a day when I plan on starting to regain. Lots of people on ASD have tried various ways to get that through to Caleb so I picked a way of saying that same thing that I couldn't find anyone else had used. Having phases last some number of days is fine. Having the diet last some number of days isn't. Though I lose and regain, I stay on some phase of my plan. It is a mental difference - Staying on plan is the right thing to do so when I am regaining I'm doing the wrong thing not returning to normal. I don't even consider the way I am choosing to eat now to be a diet. It is a way of life. I agree with you about arbitrary end dates. It's like saying that the train takes 12 hours to get to Chicago, aso I'm getting off in 12 hours no matter what. But telling somebody that the fact that they set an end date makes them an untouchable because they have don the same thing so many times before is not going to be helpful at all. I'm glad I was never given up on as hopeless. |
#147
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
On Feb 6, 8:42 pm, "teachrmama" wrote:
"Doug Freyburger" wrote in message oups.com... "teachrmama" wrote: So do you think he deliberately plans to regain it? Or do you think he fails to plan (a maintenance program) therefore he "plans to fail" because of the lack of a maintenance program? That's it. The first year it was fails to plan. The second year it was fails to plan. By the fourth year it was plans to fail. Each year there has to be some expectation of learning. At some point it evolves from fails to plan to plans to fail to intends to regain. And nobody else here has ever done something similar (gaining and losing a number of times before they got it right)? Caleb is very up front with his successes and failures, so it's easy to criticize him. How many of us would like our successes and failures paraded out in similar fashion? I know I wouldn't!! (Or maybe I'm the only one here who ever lost, regained, lost, regained, before I finally got it right) I lose and regain as well. What I finally learned is that if I declare an end date that means I have declared a day when I plan on starting to regain. Lots of people on ASD have tried various ways to get that through to Caleb so I picked a way of saying that same thing that I couldn't find anyone else had used. Having phases last some number of days is fine. Having the diet last some number of days isn't. Though I lose and regain, I stay on some phase of my plan. It is a mental difference - Staying on plan is the right thing to do so when I am regaining I'm doing the wrong thing not returning to normal. I don't even consider the way I am choosing to eat now to be a diet. It is a way of life. I agree with you about arbitrary end dates. It's like saying that the train takes 12 hours to get to Chicago, aso I'm getting off in 12 hours no matter what. But telling somebody that the fact that they set an end date makes them an untouchable because they have don the same thing so many times before is not going to be helpful at all. I'm glad I was never given up on as hopeless. About the arbitrary deadline -- Well, we end school classes at a certain time (perhaps 50 minutes), pay taxes at a certain time, go in for yearly check-ups at a certain time, do Spring cleaning at a certain time. When I used to run long distances, I would set for myself a goal of getting to a distant point, and then once I made that point, I would set another goal. Seems to me that a lot of people do similar things, perhaps clean their houses while a certain record is playing, etc. Whatever it takes to help them focus on the task at hand and maintain their behavior over time. Perfection is certainly an ideal to be striven for, but if we tell people that perfection is required, as is the total commitment to a given way of behavior for the rest of their lives, I think a lot of people would be scared away, and a lot would see any faltering as clear proof that the goals are beyond them. Also it is unrealistic to demand that people comply with such a regimen, I think. Just my two cents about different methods of maintaining motivation over some difficult portions of time. Yours, Caleb |
#148
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
On Mon, 5 Feb 2007 11:08:12 -0800, determined wrote:
Oh ****. Here is a "clinical psychologist" encouraging a person with an eating disorder to starve herself. Oh ****. Here is a 20 something divorcee twit lecturing about who cares while she plays all day on Usenet while her child is.........? ----== Posted via Newsfeeds.Com - Unlimited-Unrestricted-Secure Usenet News==---- http://www.newsfeeds.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! 120,000+ Newsgroups ----= East and West-Coast Server Farms - Total Privacy via Encryption =---- |
#149
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
"Caleb" wrote in message oups.com... On Feb 6, 8:42 pm, "teachrmama" wrote: "Doug Freyburger" wrote in message oups.com... "teachrmama" wrote: So do you think he deliberately plans to regain it? Or do you think he fails to plan (a maintenance program) therefore he "plans to fail" because of the lack of a maintenance program? That's it. The first year it was fails to plan. The second year it was fails to plan. By the fourth year it was plans to fail. Each year there has to be some expectation of learning. At some point it evolves from fails to plan to plans to fail to intends to regain. And nobody else here has ever done something similar (gaining and losing a number of times before they got it right)? Caleb is very up front with his successes and failures, so it's easy to criticize him. How many of us would like our successes and failures paraded out in similar fashion? I know I wouldn't!! (Or maybe I'm the only one here who ever lost, regained, lost, regained, before I finally got it right) I lose and regain as well. What I finally learned is that if I declare an end date that means I have declared a day when I plan on starting to regain. Lots of people on ASD have tried various ways to get that through to Caleb so I picked a way of saying that same thing that I couldn't find anyone else had used. Having phases last some number of days is fine. Having the diet last some number of days isn't. Though I lose and regain, I stay on some phase of my plan. It is a mental difference - Staying on plan is the right thing to do so when I am regaining I'm doing the wrong thing not returning to normal. I don't even consider the way I am choosing to eat now to be a diet. It is a way of life. I agree with you about arbitrary end dates. It's like saying that the train takes 12 hours to get to Chicago, aso I'm getting off in 12 hours no matter what. But telling somebody that the fact that they set an end date makes them an untouchable because they have don the same thing so many times before is not going to be helpful at all. I'm glad I was never given up on as hopeless. About the arbitrary deadline -- Well, we end school classes at a certain time (perhaps 50 minutes), pay taxes at a certain time, go in for yearly check-ups at a certain time, do Spring cleaning at a certain time. When I used to run long distances, I would set for myself a goal of getting to a distant point, and then once I made that point, I would set another goal. Seems to me that a lot of people do similar things, perhaps clean their houses while a certain record is playing, etc. Whatever it takes to help them focus on the task at hand and maintain their behavior over time. Perfection is certainly an ideal to be striven for, but if we tell people that perfection is required, as is the total commitment to a given way of behavior for the rest of their lives, I think a lot of people would be scared away, and a lot would see any faltering as clear proof that the goals are beyond them. Also it is unrealistic to demand that people comply with such a regimen, I think. Just my two cents about different methods of maintaining motivation over some difficult portions of time. Rather that a time goal, I do have a certain weight loss goal. That is when I will begin the Maintenance portion of my new way of life. I would certainly like to ahve reached my goal one year from when I started--but I will not change back to how I ate before when I getto ether the one year mark or the weight goal. And the way of eating I follow now is not a stringent "thou shalt not" sort of plan. It is liveable--which is why it is working for me. I agree with you about the perfection thing--even the smallest thing can spoil perfection, which makes it unworkable for the vast majority of the human race. So--just because I am insatiebly curious--how exactly are you setting up your eating program when you get to maintenance? You've mentioned the scale, but do you have any sort of a food plan in mind? =c) |
#150
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Invitation to discuss low-calorie approaches to weight-loss on alt.support.diet.low-calorie
On Feb 6, 11:29 pm, "teachrmama" wrote:
"Caleb" wrote in message oups.com... On Feb 6, 8:42 pm, "teachrmama" wrote: "Doug Freyburger" wrote in message groups.com... "teachrmama" wrote: So do you think he deliberately plans to regain it? Or do you think he fails to plan (a maintenance program) therefore he "plans to fail" because of the lack of a maintenance program? That's it. The first year it was fails to plan. The second year it was fails to plan. By the fourth year it was plans to fail. Each year there has to be some expectation of learning. At some point it evolves from fails to plan to plans to fail to intends to regain. And nobody else here has ever done something similar (gaining and losing a number of times before they got it right)? Caleb is very up front with his successes and failures, so it's easy to criticize him. How many of us would like our successes and failures paraded out in similar fashion? I know I wouldn't!! (Or maybe I'm the only one here who ever lost, regained, lost, regained, before I finally got it right) I lose and regain as well. What I finally learned is that if I declare an end date that means I have declared a day when I plan on starting to regain. Lots of people on ASD have tried various ways to get that through to Caleb so I picked a way of saying that same thing that I couldn't find anyone else had used. Having phases last some number of days is fine. Having the diet last some number of days isn't. Though I lose and regain, I stay on some phase of my plan. It is a mental difference - Staying on plan is the right thing to do so when I am regaining I'm doing the wrong thing not returning to normal. I don't even consider the way I am choosing to eat now to be a diet. It is a way of life. I agree with you about arbitrary end dates. It's like saying that the train takes 12 hours to get to Chicago, aso I'm getting off in 12 hours no matter what. But telling somebody that the fact that they set an end date makes them an untouchable because they have don the same thing so many times before is not going to be helpful at all. I'm glad I was never given up on as hopeless. About the arbitrary deadline -- Well, we end school classes at a certain time (perhaps 50 minutes), pay taxes at a certain time, go in for yearly check-ups at a certain time, do Spring cleaning at a certain time. When I used to run long distances, I would set for myself a goal of getting to a distant point, and then once I made that point, I would set another goal. Seems to me that a lot of people do similar things, perhaps clean their houses while a certain record is playing, etc. Whatever it takes to help them focus on the task at hand and maintain their behavior over time. Perfection is certainly an ideal to be striven for, but if we tell people that perfection is required, as is the total commitment to a given way of behavior for the rest of their lives, I think a lot of people would be scared away, and a lot would see any faltering as clear proof that the goals are beyond them. Also it is unrealistic to demand that people comply with such a regimen, I think. Just my two cents about different methods of maintaining motivation over some difficult portions of time. Rather that a time goal, I do have a certain weight loss goal. That is when I will begin the Maintenance portion of my new way of life. I would certainly like to ahve reached my goal one year from when I started--but I will not change back to how I ate before when I getto ether the one year mark or the weight goal. And the way of eating I follow now is not a stringent "thou shalt not" sort of plan. It is liveable--which is why it is working for me. I agree with you about the perfection thing--even the smallest thing can spoil perfection, which makes it unworkable for the vast majority of the human race. So--just because I am insatiebly curious--how exactly are you setting up your eating program when you get to maintenance? You've mentioned the scale, but do you have any sort of a food plan in mind? =c) Teachrmama -- I don't know exactly exactly. My daughter is vegetarian and I certainly will emphasize the green and growing things. Limited meals, reasonable amounts of exercise, less or no beer -- those things all make sense to me. Like most people, i have difficulty tracking calories regularly but I sure am willing to do this if the scales show a reason to. And as I said, I'm taking pictures of myself each Monday evening and I will keep a series of those in my kitchen. It's too easy to forget where one has been as time goes on. Reminds me of the quote by the psychologist Zimbardo who said that the elderly think of themselves as young, only in older skin. I agree with that also with a lot of overweight people -- that is, they still think of themselves as less overweight. So I think pictorial evidence of previous overweight vs current standard weight is likely to be very useful. Indeed, perhaps a weekly picture from here on out will be useful. I think the scale is the most important thing, however, because it is the canary in the coal mine well before other important and negative consequences of overweight arise. The scale and I will continue to be great friends! (I'm thinking of hanging my car keys on it, and so whenever I drive somewhere, I will weigh myself. Might even help with global warming!) And of course other behavioral methods are good -- leave the kitchen at 7 PM and eat nothing more after that -- that by itself will save a lot of evening calories. Yours truly, caleb |
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