Opinions on meetings from others...

wrote in message
ps.com...
On Apr 10, 10:53 pm, "spaceyjane" wrote:
Okie-dokie... my mother has done WW 2 years ago with success, but she
only
attended 9 meetings total and chose to do the rest on her own. She's a
unique duck in that she's very good at "programming" herself when she
sets
her mind to it.... with the same breakfast & lunch everyday, no snacking,
and small portion size dinner. Crazy woman. Here I sit, scheming to see
how much I can eat to still stay within my points range. I think to
myself
often, what can I eat the most of, with the littlest points, so I can eat
and eat and eat to feel full full full, while she just has no problems
staying within portion size and small things, etc.


Good for her.
I have had partners who have joined Weight Watchers(this was when I
was not overwieight..........long time ago galaxy far away lol)
They would always stop going and put on weight again, re-join because
"it has worked before"- this baffles me as, to my mind it had
obviously not worked.

Over time I got less active and put on too much weight- I decided to
do it on my own.

I researched on the net for all the current thinking on nutrition that
made sense to me- eat less, exercise more.

I already knew what were bad foods and what were good foods anyway-
deep down most people do they just choose to give in and eat the wrong
choices.

This is me... I know what I should do, but I do not do it... then when I get
the result I did not want, I find it hilarious that I struggle to figure out
why this happened. I know why it happened... but denial is a powerful drug.

At the end of the day I thought to myself- I will have to be able to
do this for the rest of my life- I know my weight will fluctuate, over
holidays for example, but I have to take control of me and there are
no easy ways of doing it.

This also saved me money )

Anyway, I have a point... somewhere along the lines of me starting WW
last
year, then stopping and relatively maintaining, then gradually and
sneakly
putting it back on... I am now at the point of desperation to say this is
enough! I need to go back to meetings and have the accountability as
well
as the positive influence (from real people, not like my mom who is like
fairyland WW person). Anyway, my mom suggests I just go a couple times
to
get "jumpstarted" and then I can do the rest on my own. Boy, sounds nice
(and inexpensive) but also hits me in a way to say... "uhhh, yeah. like
you
know that's not going to work"

I think if you are the sort of person who can't do it without the
support of others you will need to go for the rest of your life, that
isn't necessarily a bad thing as support groups can be very social

Then, I also hear the same kind of thing from my husband... "you don't
need
to go back to WW... you know what you need to do, just do it..." ummmm,
yeah. like easy for you to say. Obviously when on my own, I am
accountable
to myself, and myself is a little too forgiving of grazing, snacking,
abuse
of wonderful cookies, and stuffing her face with larger portion sizes
than
really necessary.

I hear you I didn't have any idea of portion contol till I started
weighing EVERYTHING, I'm not so strict with the scales anymore as I
have learned over time what a portion is.
He's right though but you shouldn't criticise him for it.


I understand what you're saying here, and I understand deeply where my
husband's heart is in trying to encourage me in this way, but I have come to
understand something about myself that for here and now, I need the
accountability, as well as the place to go and dialog with others on the
same journey. My husband if he gets a gut, all he does is stop eating two
ice creams, and he's slimmed down. He has the metabolism of a hummingbird I
think. I love him dearly and know he is supportive of me looking and
feeling my best, and after I went to the meeting yesterday he said he was
proud of me... so I know we'll work on this together.

I don't know if I need something to say to them, so that I can feel less
guilty about "needing" to go to meetings, or if it's an internal thing
that
I need to be able to say to me, in order to trust that they mean well,
but
that in the long run, I know what I need.

You don'thave to feel guilty about anything if you need to go, go.

I know this will make no sense here, so I apologize in advance for the
confusion caused..

Eh? I would have thought we're all in the same fat boat )

any light you could shed would be wonderful!
smiles,
j


just my 2p worth

thanks for sharing your experiences and what you see... It's helpful to
me... : )

Everyone has there own opinions...And as they say opinions are like ...well
you know...Go with what is right for you...That's really all that
matters...GG
"spaceyjane" wrote in message
...
Okie-dokie... my mother has done WW 2 years ago with success, but she only
attended 9 meetings total and chose to do the rest on her own. She's a
unique duck in that she's very good at "programming" herself when she sets
her mind to it.... with the same breakfast & lunch everyday, no snacking,
and small portion size dinner. Crazy woman. Here I sit, scheming to see
how much I can eat to still stay within my points range. I think to
myself often, what can I eat the most of, with the littlest points, so I
can eat and eat and eat to feel full full full, while she just has no
problems staying within portion size and small things, etc.

Anyway, I have a point... somewhere along the lines of me starting WW last
year, then stopping and relatively maintaining, then gradually and sneakly
putting it back on... I am now at the point of desperation to say this is
enough! I need to go back to meetings and have the accountability as well
as the positive influence (from real people, not like my mom who is like
fairyland WW person). Anyway, my mom suggests I just go a couple times to
get "jumpstarted" and then I can do the rest on my own. Boy, sounds nice
(and inexpensive) but also hits me in a way to say... "uhhh, yeah. like
you know that's not going to work"

Then, I also hear the same kind of thing from my husband... "you don't
need to go back to WW... you know what you need to do, just do it..."
ummmm, yeah. like easy for you to say. Obviously when on my own, I am
accountable to myself, and myself is a little too forgiving of grazing,
snacking, abuse of wonderful cookies, and stuffing her face with larger
portion sizes than really necessary.

I don't know if I need something to say to them, so that I can feel less
guilty about "needing" to go to meetings, or if it's an internal thing
that I need to be able to say to me, in order to trust that they mean
well, but that in the long run, I know what I need.

I know this will make no sense here, so I apologize in advance for the
confusion caused..

any light you could shed would be wonderful!
smiles,
j

spaceyjane wrote:

Portion control is a huge thing for me... and I would love to be free from
the bounds of feeling entitled to more more more. The other thing that I'm
going to have to awake my senses to is the so-called thing that happens in
your brain that is supposed to tell your stomach when it's satisfied. That
seems like a totally foriegn thing to me... what a concept that my brain is
trying to communicate with my stomach to say "I'm satisfied" but here I am
so busy wanting to stuff stuff stuff. *sigh* this will be good to learn
to recognize, eh?

This is my serious difficulty. I cope best counting points, as then I
can say to myself: a portion of Xxx weights Y oz/grams: ONE portion IS
enough! Just eat it and wait! When I tried core, I still had to weigh
portions or I found that I was eating way (weigh!) too much because my
'I'm Full!' switch doesn't work properly! And while man cannot live on
bread alone, this woman cannot live without bread at all!
--
Kate XXXXXX R.C.T.Q Madame Chef des Trolls
Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons
http://www.katedicey.co.uk
Click on Kate's Pages and explore!

I currently have the monthly pass with etools, its $40.00 a month and that
is it. I am not at goal. I got within a couple of pounds and have gained a
bit back, I seem to be developing new allergies/reasons to retain water...
and then extensive travel didn't help... I have no excuses and few reasons
why this gain happened, what I am proud to say is that I haven't given up.

I will if need be pay the fee for the rest of my life to not regain it all
and I am sure I would do just that if I quit. This is a wonderful group,
and I am a walking advertisement for WW, if that helps you I am thrilled,
giving back some of the wonderful support I have gotten here makes me very
happy, Lee
spaceyjane wrote in message
. ..
totally with you on this... I'm not a joiner by nature either... I think
for
me it has something to do with being vulnerable in front of others, as
well
as the humbling of myself that it's something necessary. I do know
exactly
what you mean about the WW meeting being like an AA meeting... I think the
root behaviors are very similar, but we picked the food which is more
socially acceptable to be bound to... somehow because it's a vital part of
life, readjusting our relationship to it is harder, because it's included
in
most everything and our society is structured partly around it. I think
last time with WW I was just barly touching my toe into the water of it
all... and then I honestly think I wasn't ready to deal with the depth of
the issues and my coping mechanisms or denial, or what have you, that I
backed out as a way to avoid the possible painful things that would arise.
This time around, and leading up to this rejoining, I have really been
twisting it all around in my heart to realize that I can't live this way
of
using food as a comfort tool or an avoidance tool, or a tool to help me
not
be bored... I really need to address those things apart from food, and
have
food be what it's meant to be, a nutrient source of fuel to keep my engine
going, so that in my heart I can deal with the issues the way I was
origionally made to.

Lots to think about... for sure...
lots to reflect on over the rest of my life.

My gosh Lee... 233 weeks I am so proud of you. That is amazing! Do you
have to a reduced fee, or are you a life time member? I'm totally glad to
have found you.

"Stormmee" wrote in message
...
speaking of sabotage...

first you know what you need. I am not a joiner by nature, in fact on
the
whole I do not like crowds of any kind. but I MUST have my meetings
like
an
alcoholic needs the AA time. You first figure out you need the meeting
then
you put into place a plan to attend.

Next, if we assume that both of them mean well, then they don't
understand
your struggle and you have to either try and explain it to them or just
let
it go. For the most part unless money is the issue I would let it go.
Your
mom is your mom and I think when the mom gene kicks in so does the food
pusher, even when they themselves have a weight problem.

next if money is an issue the monthly deal with the website is $40.00 a
month and you can save that in reduced grocery bills, there might be a
cable
channel that you watch that DH does not and you can cut that out... also
you
might tell DH you want to put off exercise equipment in favor of
meetings
for a while so you can make sure it will stick this time... this does
two
things... gives him comfort about the expenditures and if he is
sabotaging,
not buying the exercise equipment will distract him for a while. and it
will also reduce your guilt/anxiety at having to use/lose...

I am now rambling also but hope I have helped you,

Lee
spaceyjane wrote in message
...
Okie-dokie... my mother has done WW 2 years ago with success, but she
only
attended 9 meetings total and chose to do the rest on her own. She's a
unique duck in that she's very good at "programming" herself when she
sets
her mind to it.... with the same breakfast & lunch everyday, no
snacking,
and small portion size dinner. Crazy woman. Here I sit, scheming to
see
how much I can eat to still stay within my points range. I think to
myself
often, what can I eat the most of, with the littlest points, so I can
eat
and eat and eat to feel full full full, while she just has no problems
staying within portion size and small things, etc.

Anyway, I have a point... somewhere along the lines of me starting WW
last
year, then stopping and relatively maintaining, then gradually and
sneakly
putting it back on... I am now at the point of desperation to say this
is
enough! I need to go back to meetings and have the accountability as
well
as the positive influence (from real people, not like my mom who is
like
fairyland WW person). Anyway, my mom suggests I just go a couple times
to
get "jumpstarted" and then I can do the rest on my own. Boy, sounds
nice
(and inexpensive) but also hits me in a way to say... "uhhh, yeah.
like
you
know that's not going to work"

Then, I also hear the same kind of thing from my husband... "you don't
need
to go back to WW... you know what you need to do, just do it..."
ummmm,
yeah. like easy for you to say. Obviously when on my own, I am
accountable
to myself, and myself is a little too forgiving of grazing, snacking,
abuse
of wonderful cookies, and stuffing her face with larger portion sizes
than
really necessary.

I don't know if I need something to say to them, so that I can feel
less
guilty about "needing" to go to meetings, or if it's an internal thing
that
I need to be able to say to me, in order to trust that they mean well,
but
that in the long run, I know what I need.

I know this will make no sense here, so I apologize in advance for the
confusion caused..

any light you could shed would be wonderful!
smiles,
j