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"Hidden Benefits of Body Size" (whoops, kind of long)
Sorry if this posts twice, but it is not appearing for me -- it showed up
for a minute and then said it was no longer available on the server. So I am trying again! I was intrigued with the idea when I first heard it a few years ago (from Dr. Phil, I think) -- that we remain overweight for some "payoff" reason that is usually unconscious. I had a hard time with that one, feeling as though I would do anything to be thin, and hated being fat. Yet despite *22 years* of trying to get below 200, making more effort toward losing weight than anyone else I knew, I couldn't do it. Now that I'm reading "The Solution" by Laurel Mellin, I'm reminded of this concept because there's a section in there called "The Hidden Benefits of Body Size." I found it intriguing enough to quote here and hope it will spark some thought and conversation: "Maintaining a body size larger than our biologic comfort zone is how we send wordless messages to others. Even if we spend years dieting and sweating off pounds, this voice will express itself through a relentless sabotage that results in weight staying rock solid. "Little or none of this is conscious. We don't *purposely* sabotage our healthy eating and scuttle our exercise plans to keep our weight high, *but it may still be happening.* We seem to spontaneously regain the weight without really knowing why. "What is our challenge? To give that voice words and sound so that it can speak directly and stop expressing itself through extra weight." Then it goes on and gives examples of case studies of people who used their weight to say, "I don't want you to know me. Stay away." or "I feel powerless. Taking up space gives me power." or "Don't expect too much from me." None of these reasons was realized consciously, and some of the people were "aghast" to find out what they were using their weight to say. There's also a box with many common messages people use: "What does your weight say for you? "Don't notice me. I am not important. I am powerful. I feel powerless. I am a good mother. Feel sorry for me. I don't want sex. I am stable and dependable. Don't mess with me. Don't expect too much of me. I am not perfect. Stay away from me. I feel angry. I am afraid to be all I can be. I am not worthy. I have given up. I am loyal to my family. I don't want to grow up. I don't want you to judge me. I reject you. I need space. I need love." I immediately recognized, "I don't want to grow up," and perhaps "I need space," as well as "I need love" and a few more. I want to examine more of these and see which apply -- indeed that's what the author suggests: "Obviously, our weight speaks to the world in paragraphs, not just sentences. If you maintain a slight distance ... saying to yourself, "I wonder what my weight says for me now?" you'll probably come back to this question over and over again, and come up with a different answer each time. All the sentiments that your weight communicates for you can be brought to your awareness and expressed verbally. Each time you use words, not your weight, to express yourself, you'll *need* the extra weight less. Then it becomes easier and easier to attain the weight you've determined is best for your health and happiness." If this rings a bell for any of you, I highly recommend borrowing this book from the library. Again, it's "The Solution" by Laurel Mellin. Mary M 325-163-145 |
#2
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I quickly read through people's responses and am on my way out the door soon
so I can't write right now -- but I am looking forward to responding to those posts because they have given me a lot to think about. I can relate so much to the concept of still thinking of myself as fat -- "ghost fat" that I still see and I expect others to see it too -- am still a bit dumbfounded by it all ... Mary |
#3
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In article , Mary M/Ohio
wrote: Sorry if this posts twice, but it is not appearing for me -- it showed up for a minute and then said it was no longer available on the server. So I am trying again! I was intrigued with the idea when I first heard it a few years ago (from Dr. Phil, I think) -- that we remain overweight for some "payoff" reason that is usually unconscious. Just as Dr, Phil maintains his fascination with weight issues because for him it's a big pay off. -- Diva ***** Hostile cooperation is at the core of passive-aggression, |
#4
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numerous other pro-Israeli Neo-Cons inhabiting the Bush
Jr. administration. These pro-Israeli Neo-Cons had been schooled in the Machiavellian/Nietzschean theories of Professor Leo Strauss who taught political philosophy at the University of Chicago in its Department of Political Science. The best exposé of Strauss's pernicious theories on law, politics, government, for elitism, and against democracy can be found in two scholarly books by the Canadian Professor of Political Philosophy Shadia B. Drury.2 I entered the University of Chicago in September of 1968 shortly after Strauss had retired. But I was trained in Chicago's Political Science Department by Strauss's foremost protégé, co-author, and later literary executor Joseph Cropsey. Based upon my personal experience as an alumnus of Chicago's Political Science Department (A.B., 1971, in Political Science), I concur completely with Professor Drury's devastating critique of Strauss. I also agree with her penetrating analysis of the degradation of the American political process that has been inflicted by Chicago's Straussian Neo-Con cabal.3 The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable other students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That is precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated towards the University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other universities. Years later, the University of Chicago b |
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"Ignoramus22980" wrote in message ... On Fri, 10 Dec 2004 05:49:56 GMT, Carol Frilegh wrote: The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable other students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That is precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated towards the University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other universities. Years later, the University of Chicago b I wonder if I, being a graduate of the University of Chicago, am also a ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellian. -- 223/172.2/180 I can't believe you were ignorant enough to respond to one of these attack posts and didn't trim the damn headers. |
#6
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"Ignoramus22980" wrote in message ... On Fri, 10 Dec 2004 05:49:56 GMT, Carol Frilegh wrote: The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable other students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That is precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated towards the University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other universities. Years later, the University of Chicago b I wonder if I, being a graduate of the University of Chicago, am also a ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellian. -- 223/172.2/180 I can't believe you were ignorant enough to respond to one of these attack posts and didn't trim the damn headers. |
#7
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Beverly wrote: "Ignoramus22980" wrote in message ... On Fri, 10 Dec 2004 05:49:56 GMT, Carol Frilegh wrote: The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable other students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That is precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated towards the University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other universities. Years later, the University of Chicago b I wonder if I, being a graduate of the University of Chicago, am also a ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellian. -- 223/172.2/180 I can't believe you were ignorant enough to respond to one of these attack posts and didn't trim the damn headers. I can. Jenn |
#8
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Hey, somebodies got to do it...
Feal free to "copy and paste" this: The forgeries seen in your group are the product of an entity collectively known as "Dippy" to us NANAE users. One of his latest attacks consist of crossposting Forgeries to random news groups & "news.admin-net-abuse.email". If you simply reply to these posts you'll become part of his distributed attack on our newsgroup. Because of this NANAE has become flooded by these "What The F***!" posts, none of which are as easily filtered out as the tens of thousands of the Sporgeries a day we usually get: http://groups.google.com/groups?num=...&btnG=S earch If you must respond to these posts please be kind, and only reply to the newsgroup it was posted in... Thank You. -- The Tech Zero, Maxx Pollare - Traveling without moving... |
#9
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Hey, somebodies got to do it...
Feal free to "copy and paste" this: The forgeries seen in your group are the product of an entity collectively known as "Dippy" to us NANAE users. One of his latest attacks consist of crossposting Forgeries to random news groups & "news.admin-net-abuse.email". If you simply reply to these posts you'll become part of his distributed attack on our newsgroup. Because of this NANAE has become flooded by these "What The F***!" posts, none of which are as easily filtered out as the tens of thousands of the Sporgeries a day we usually get: http://groups.google.com/groups?num=...&btnG=S earch If you must respond to these posts please be kind, and only reply to the newsgroup it was posted in... Thank You. -- The Tech Zero, Maxx Pollare - Traveling without moving... |
#10
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In article .com, JMA
wrote: Beverly wrote: "Ignoramus22980" wrote in message ... On Fri, 10 Dec 2004 05:49:56 GMT, Carol Frilegh wrote: The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable other students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That is precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated towards the University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other universities. Years later, the University of Chicago b I wonder if I, being a graduate of the University of Chicago, am also a ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellian. -- 223/172.2/180 I can't believe you were ignorant enough to respond to one of these attack posts and didn't trim the damn headers. I can. Jenn That's it Jenn, your preoccupation with Ig is tiresome and dilutes the qualities of your intelligent posts. BFN -- Diva ***** The Best Man For The Job Is A Woman |
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