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"Hidden Benefits of Body Size" (whoops, kind of long)



 
 
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  #1  
Old December 9th, 2004, 04:21 PM
Mary M/Ohio
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Default "Hidden Benefits of Body Size" (whoops, kind of long)

Sorry if this posts twice, but it is not appearing for me -- it showed up
for a minute and then said it was no longer available on the server. So I am
trying again!


I was intrigued with the idea when I first heard it a few years ago (from
Dr. Phil, I think) -- that we remain overweight for some "payoff" reason
that is usually unconscious. I had a hard time with that one, feeling as
though I would do anything to be thin, and hated being fat. Yet despite *22
years* of trying to get below 200, making more effort toward losing weight
than anyone else I knew, I couldn't do it. Now that I'm reading "The
Solution" by Laurel Mellin, I'm reminded of this concept because there's a
section in there called "The Hidden Benefits of Body Size." I found it
intriguing enough to quote here and hope it will spark some thought and
conversation:

"Maintaining a body size larger than our biologic comfort zone is how we
send wordless messages to others. Even if we spend years dieting and
sweating off pounds, this voice will express itself through a relentless
sabotage that results in weight staying rock solid.

"Little or none of this is conscious. We don't *purposely* sabotage our
healthy eating and scuttle our exercise plans to keep our weight high, *but
it may still be happening.* We seem to spontaneously regain the weight
without really knowing why.

"What is our challenge? To give that voice words and sound so that it can
speak directly and stop expressing itself through extra weight."

Then it goes on and gives examples of case studies of people who used their
weight to say, "I don't want you to know me. Stay away." or "I feel
powerless. Taking up space gives me power." or "Don't expect too much from
me." None of these reasons was realized consciously, and some of the people
were "aghast" to find out what they were using their weight to say.

There's also a box with many common messages people use:

"What does your weight say for you?

"Don't notice me.
I am not important.
I am powerful.
I feel powerless.
I am a good mother.
Feel sorry for me.
I don't want sex.
I am stable and dependable.
Don't mess with me.
Don't expect too much of me.
I am not perfect.
Stay away from me.
I feel angry.
I am afraid to be all I can be.
I am not worthy.
I have given up.
I am loyal to my family.
I don't want to grow up.
I don't want you to judge me.
I reject you.
I need space.
I need love."

I immediately recognized, "I don't want to grow up," and perhaps "I need
space," as well as "I need love" and a few more. I want to examine more of
these and see which apply -- indeed that's what the author suggests:

"Obviously, our weight speaks to the world in paragraphs, not just
sentences. If you maintain a slight distance ... saying to yourself, "I
wonder what my weight says for me now?" you'll probably come back to this
question over and over again, and come up with a different answer each time.
All the sentiments that your weight communicates for you can be brought to
your awareness and expressed verbally. Each time you use words, not your
weight, to express yourself, you'll *need* the extra weight less. Then it
becomes easier and easier to attain the weight you've determined is best for
your health and happiness."

If this rings a bell for any of you, I highly recommend borrowing this book
from the library. Again, it's "The Solution" by Laurel Mellin.

Mary M
325-163-145



  #2  
Old December 9th, 2004, 06:17 PM
Mary M/Ohio
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I quickly read through people's responses and am on my way out the door soon
so I can't write right now -- but I am looking forward to responding to
those posts because they have given me a lot to think about. I can relate so
much to the concept of still thinking of myself as fat -- "ghost fat" that I
still see and I expect others to see it too -- am still a bit dumbfounded by
it all ...

Mary


  #3  
Old December 10th, 2004, 12:37 AM
Carol Frilegh
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In article , Mary M/Ohio
wrote:

Sorry if this posts twice, but it is not appearing for me -- it showed up
for a minute and then said it was no longer available on the server. So I am
trying again!


I was intrigued with the idea when I first heard it a few years ago (from
Dr. Phil, I think) -- that we remain overweight for some "payoff" reason
that is usually unconscious.


Just as Dr, Phil maintains his fascination with weight issues because
for him it's a big pay off.

--
Diva
*****
Hostile cooperation is at the core of passive-aggression,
  #4  
Old December 10th, 2004, 06:49 AM
Carol Frilegh
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numerous other pro-Israeli Neo-Cons inhabiting the Bush
Jr. administration. These pro-Israeli Neo-Cons had been schooled in the
Machiavellian/Nietzschean theories of Professor Leo Strauss who taught
political philosophy at the University of Chicago in its Department of
Political Science. The best exposé of Strauss's pernicious theories on
law, politics, government, for elitism, and against democracy can be
found in two scholarly books by the Canadian Professor of Political
Philosophy Shadia B. Drury.2 I entered the University of Chicago in
September of 1968 shortly after Strauss had retired. But I was trained
in Chicago's Political Science Department by Strauss's foremost protégé,
co-author, and later literary executor Joseph Cropsey. Based upon my
personal experience as an alumnus of Chicago's Political Science
Department (A.B., 1971, in Political Science), I concur completely with
Professor Drury's devastating critique of Strauss. I also agree with her
penetrating analysis of the degradation of the American political
process that has been inflicted by Chicago's Straussian Neo-Con cabal.3

The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable other
students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That is
precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated towards the
University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other universities.
Years later, the University of Chicago b


  #5  
Old December 10th, 2004, 01:02 PM
Beverly
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Default


"Ignoramus22980" wrote in message
...
On Fri, 10 Dec 2004 05:49:56 GMT, Carol Frilegh wrote:
The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable other
students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That is
precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated towards the
University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other universities.
Years later, the University of Chicago b


I wonder if I, being a graduate of the University of Chicago, am also a
ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellian.

--
223/172.2/180


I can't believe you were ignorant enough to respond to one of these attack
posts and didn't trim the damn headers.



  #6  
Old December 10th, 2004, 01:02 PM
Beverly
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Posts: n/a
Default


"Ignoramus22980" wrote in message
...
On Fri, 10 Dec 2004 05:49:56 GMT, Carol Frilegh wrote:
The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable other
students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That is
precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated towards the
University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other universities.
Years later, the University of Chicago b


I wonder if I, being a graduate of the University of Chicago, am also a
ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellian.

--
223/172.2/180


I can't believe you were ignorant enough to respond to one of these attack
posts and didn't trim the damn headers.



  #7  
Old December 10th, 2004, 02:29 PM
JMA
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Posts: n/a
Default


Beverly wrote:
"Ignoramus22980" wrote in

message
...
On Fri, 10 Dec 2004 05:49:56 GMT, Carol Frilegh

wrote:
The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable

other
students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That

is
precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated

towards the
University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other

universities.
Years later, the University of Chicago b


I wonder if I, being a graduate of the University of Chicago, am

also a
ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellian.

--
223/172.2/180


I can't believe you were ignorant enough to respond to one of these

attack
posts and didn't trim the damn headers.


I can.

Jenn

  #8  
Old December 10th, 2004, 03:01 PM
BJ in Texas
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Posts: n/a
Default

Hey, somebodies got to do it...

Feal free to "copy and paste" this:

The forgeries seen in your group are the product of an entity
collectively known as "Dippy" to us NANAE users. One of his
latest
attacks consist of crossposting Forgeries to random news
groups &
"news.admin-net-abuse.email". If you simply reply to these
posts
you'll become part of his distributed attack on our newsgroup.

Because of this NANAE has become flooded by these "What The
F***!"
posts, none of which are as easily filtered out as the tens of
thousands of the Sporgeries a day we usually get:

http://groups.google.com/groups?num=...&btnG=S earch

If you must respond to these posts please be kind, and only
reply to
the newsgroup it was posted in... Thank You.

--
The Tech Zero, Maxx Pollare - Traveling without moving...


  #9  
Old December 10th, 2004, 03:01 PM
BJ in Texas
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Hey, somebodies got to do it...

Feal free to "copy and paste" this:

The forgeries seen in your group are the product of an entity
collectively known as "Dippy" to us NANAE users. One of his
latest
attacks consist of crossposting Forgeries to random news
groups &
"news.admin-net-abuse.email". If you simply reply to these
posts
you'll become part of his distributed attack on our newsgroup.

Because of this NANAE has become flooded by these "What The
F***!"
posts, none of which are as easily filtered out as the tens of
thousands of the Sporgeries a day we usually get:

http://groups.google.com/groups?num=...&btnG=S earch

If you must respond to these posts please be kind, and only
reply to
the newsgroup it was posted in... Thank You.

--
The Tech Zero, Maxx Pollare - Traveling without moving...


  #10  
Old December 10th, 2004, 03:17 PM
Carol Frilegh
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

In article .com, JMA
wrote:

Beverly wrote:
"Ignoramus22980" wrote in

message
...
On Fri, 10 Dec 2004 05:49:56 GMT, Carol Frilegh

wrote:
The University of Chicago routinely trained me and innumerable

other
students to become ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellians. That

is
precisely why so many neophyte Neo-Con students gravitated

towards the
University of Chicago or towards Chicago Alumni at other

universities.
Years later, the University of Chicago b

I wonder if I, being a graduate of the University of Chicago, am

also a
ruthless and unprincipled Machiavellian.

--
223/172.2/180


I can't believe you were ignorant enough to respond to one of these

attack
posts and didn't trim the damn headers.


I can.

Jenn



That's it Jenn,
your preoccupation with Ig is tiresome and dilutes the qualities of
your intelligent posts.
BFN

--
Diva
*****
The Best Man For The Job Is A Woman
 




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